The Closed Heart can be like a dead weight
stone, so cold and dead that nothing is really felt anymore, mostly thoughts
and vague emotional conflicts, but no deep feelings. But
Mother’s unconditional and infinite love can even bring a dead weight stone to
life.
The phase; most of the
teenagers experience it. Almost everyone if I must say. As I grew older, the
teenager in me became increasingly rebellious. To be honest, I had pushed
patience of everyone around me. Nobody could believe that I had grown up to be
such a ‘spoiled brat’. I had been very tame as a child. Obeying everyone,
excellent at studies, soft-spoken, is how the people who hadn't seen me for 2
or more years remembered me.
But the phase, had
introduced them to alien me. She was alien to me a well. But I enjoyed the
attention she used to get. I liked how other girls envied her. I loved being a
part of most famous clique with her. The need of independence, a separate
identity and testing authority made me cherish the alien me.
But this package of enjoyment came with
bitter gifts. Whenever I attended family gatherings, I could hear people
whispering behind my back. They would stare at me. They wouldn't let their children talk to me,
thinking I would be a bad influence on them. I wouldn't have been surprised
that if their children misbehaved, they would have compared them to me. In
short, I was a bad example for them. This didn't stop me from being the way I
had become; in fact it made me more rebellious. I stopped attending family
gatherings. I started drinking secretly. I had the most understanding parents,
but I had become too ignorant to even listen to what they had to say.
I would shut myself in
my room once I got home and would get out of the room only when the dinner was
announced. My grades dropped drastically. I bunked schools, never submitted any
of the assignments on time, made students do proxy attendance for me. I was in
bad books of my teachers.
It culminated one day,
when I was found breaking school’s rules along with my friends. The Discipline
Committee had called for our parents. My mom had to take off from her work. I
had been rusticated from school for a week.
We didn’t speak until
the next afternoon. I had locked myself in my room. I didn’t even get out of
the room for dinner, the previous night. My mom ordered me to open the door
during lunch time. I was ashamed and had no courage to face her. But, I was
extremely hungry. I opened the room. I expected to hear the words, ‘You are grounded.’
But none of us spoke anything. She broke the tension by giving me a small
gift-wrapped box. I nonchalantly opened it and found a little rock inside. I
rolled my eyes and said, “Cute.”
“Read the card,” my Mom instructed.
I took the card out of
the envelope and read it. It read- ‘This rock is more than 200,000,000 years
old. That is how long it will take before I give up on you’. Tears started
trickling down my cheeks. She hugged me. There were no conditions in her love.
It was unconditional. I knew she will love me forever and nothing can change
that. Her Love had brought a dead stone to life. This was not one of our
sweetest memories together, but this is the memory which I’ll always cherish.
Because that moment made me realize, my mother is more than a fearless woman.
She’s more than a hero. She’s more than a best friend. She’s my Life.
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